Laws and Customs of The Three Weeks, Nine Days, and Tisha Be’Av, 5782

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We call the period between the fast of the Seventeenth of Tammuz and the fast of the Ninth of Av “The Three Weeks.” We call the days between Rosh Chodesh Av and the Ninth of Av “The Nine Days.”

We commemorate the destruction of the Holy Temples as well as other tragedies that occurred during these three weeks. The mourning intensifies after Rosh Chodesh Av, which is why the laws of mourning become stricter then, culminating with the fast of Tisha Be’Av (the Ninth of Av), the day on which both Temples were destroyed.

Following are the basic laws that apply during this time. For more details, please see the Code of Jewish Law, O.C. Simanim 549 – 559.

The Three Weeks

Sunday, The Fast of the 17 of Tammuz/July 17 to Sunday, 10 Menachem Av /August 7

A Mournful Yet Auspicious Time

Despite the fact that The Three Weeks is a time of mourning for the tragedies that occurred to our people, it is also an opportune time to connect to the Almighty. This is alluded to in the verse: כָּל-רֹדְפֶיהָ הִשִּׂיגוּהָ בֵּין הַמְּצָרִים All those who run after her reached her bein hameitzarim (between the straits).^[1] This can be interpreted to mean that all those who exert themselves will be able to connect to the Shechinah in the time of the Three Weeks. (This time is referred to as bein hameitzarim.)^[2]

The reason for this is that when a person serves G-d in a difficult period it is all the more precious.^[3] In this sense, the Three Weeks can be compared to the 21 days from Rosh Hashana to Hoshana Rabba.^[4]

All the laws relating to the Three Weeks begin on the night before the fast (July 16), on Motza’ei Shabbat as that is already the 18^th of Tammuz.

During the Three Weeks the following rules apply:

She’hechiyanu and Purchasing New Items

o One should not say the blessing of Shehechiyanu which blesses the time since this is considered a “negative time.”^[5] Some say that one may say Shehechiyanu on Shabbat.^[6] According to Chabad custom, one should not say Shehechiyanu on Shabbat.^[7]

o If one will not be able to have this fruit later on because it is going out of season, one may say Shehechiyanu and eat the fruit even during the Nine Days.^[8] In this case, it is better to wait until Shabbat if possible.^[9]

o If one began to make a blessing on a new fruit and remembered that it is the Three Weeks after he already mentioned G-d’s name, he should complete both blessings (the Shehechiyanu and the Borei Pri Ha’etz) and eat the fruit in order not to transgress the sin of saying a blessing in vain.^[10]

o If one is doing a Pidyon Haben during these weeks or if one has a baby girl, the Bracha of Shehechiyanu should be said.^[11]

o One may say the blessing of HaGomel or Hatov Vehameitiv (on hearing news that is good for oneself and for others during the Three Weeks.

o It is customary not to move to a new house or apartment during these weeks.^[12]

o One who needs to move into a new house (or apartment) should put some important furniture into the house before the Three Weeks begin.^[13]

o One may purchase an investment property during these days.^[14]

o It is best not to do major renovations or paint one’s house during the Three Weeks One who began these activities before the 17^th of Tammuz may complete them up until Rosh Chodesh Av.[15] One who needs to paint or make urgent repairs may do so. (See below regarding the Nine Days.)

o It is customary not to purchase a new home during this time as it is not an auspicious time. Nevertheless, as this is not forbidden by the letter of the law, one may do so if they would otherwise experience a financial loss. This is certainly true if the closing will not take place until after Tisha Be’Av

o One should not purchase new clothes (that are significant) or other important items. Some are lenient in this regard for those who do not customarily say she’hecheyanu on these items.^[16] (See below regarding the Nine Days.) One may purchase (and wear) clothing that aren’t particularly significant such as underwear and socks.

o One who needs a new Talit or Talit Kattan may purchase and wear it during this time.

o If one finds clothes on a sale that will not be available for that price after TishaBe’Av, one may buy them during the Three Weeks but not during the Nine Days. This is particularly true when buying for one’s children and is not paying all of the money at the time of sale (i.e., when purchasing on “layaway”).^[17]

o It is best not to purchase important pieces of furniture during this time. One who needs these items urgently or if one finds them for a significantly reduced price, may purchase them.

Music

o It is customary not to listen to music during the Three Weeks. This includes recorded music or “acapella.”^[18] Some are lenient regarding “acapella” music.^[19]

o One should also not allow his children who have reached the age of chinuch(education) to listen to music.^[20]

o One may sing while davening (praying) or studying Torah or while at a farbrengen or the like, as this adds to one’s inspiration in serving the Almighty. Otherwise, one should refrain from singing.^[21]

o A music teacher who would suffer financial loss by not teaching music at this time may teach up until the week of Tisha Be’Av.^[22] (See below, that this year, since Tisha Be’av falls out on Shabbat, there is an argument if the week before the Shabbat of Tisha Be’Av is considered the week of Tisha Be’Av. Nevertheless, the students should not practice at home during this time unless they are learning music to make their parnassah (livelihood).^[23]

o One may not watch movies or TV shows that include music. It is best not to watch these ever, as many of them contain immodest or violent themes and scenes. (Besides the fact that they are, for the most part, a waste of time.)

o One who is listening to the news on the radio (or other permissible content) need not turn off the radio if there is an occasional musical “jingle” as an interlude since he does not intend to pay attention to these.^[24]

o One may listen to music while exercising if this helps them exercise since they are not listening for pleasure.

Weddings

o It is customary not to get married at this time (all of the Three Week).^[25]

o The Sefardic and Yemenite custom is to refrain from marriage only during the Nine Days.^[26]

o It is permissible to have an engagement party in the Three Weeks, but there should not be music or dancing.^[27] (See below that during the Nine Days one may get engaged but may not have an engagement meal.) Also, one should serve snacks at this event rather than a full meal. It is permissible to sing (without music) at such occasions, but it is best to minimize this as well.^[28]

Dangerous Activities

o One should refrain from engaging in dangerous activities during the Three Weeks as this is considered an inauspicious time.^[29]

o For example, one should try to refrain from:

o Having a non-urgent operation or other optional medical procedure.^[30]

o Going hiking in places that are considered dangerous.

o Hitting one’s children (This is rarely recommended.)

o Swimming in dangerous areas.^[31]

Haircuts

o It is customary for Ashkenazim not to take a haircut during this time.^[32]

o Sefardim refrain from taking haircuts from 2 Av. Some only refrain during the week of Tisha Be’Av (See below as to how this is defined this year).^[33]

o If one’s mustache is getting in the way of his eating, he may trim it until the week of Tisha Be’Av. (See below)^[34]

o If one needs to shave (in a permissible way^[35]) for business reasons, there is room for leniency during the Three Weeks and the beginning of the Nine Days, but not during the week of Tisha Be’Av.^[36] One should discuss this with his rabbi.

o One should also not give haircuts to their young children at this time.^[37]

o If a child’s third birthday falls during the Three Weeks, the upsherinish (first haircut) should be postponed until after Tisha Be’Av.^[38]

o If a woman needs to cut her hair for reasons of modesty, she may do so even during the Nine Days.^[39]

o Generally, one should refrain from cutting bodily hair at this time, but, if necessary, a woman may pluck her eyebrows or wax her legs until the week of Tisha Be’Av.^[40]

o Combing hair is permissible even in the week of Tisha Be’Av.^[41]

o There is room for leniency if a young lady needs to take a haircut in preparation for a shidduch date.^[42]

o A father of a baby who is having a brit milah may take a haircut on the day of the brit in honor of the brit. The same applies to the mohel and/or sandak.

o One whose aveilut (mourning period) ended during the Three Weeks but before Rosh Chodesh Av, may take a haircut at that time.

Positive Things
During the Three Weeks, one should add in Torah study and giving Tzedakah, especially to support mini-sanctuaries, i.e., shuls and yeshivot.^[43]
The Lubavitcher Rebbe instituted that one should increase in learning about the Bait HaMikdash (Holy Temple) during this time. The Midrash equates learning about the Bait HaMikdash to building it.^[44] Thus, by learning about it, it is as if we are building it.^[45]
The Rebbe recommended that one learn:
the relevant chapters of Yechezkel (Ezekiel 40 – 43) with commentaries,
Tractate Middot (and parts of Tamid^[46]) with commentaries,
and the Rambam (Hilchot Bait HaBechirah) with commentaries.
During this season, the Rebbe would often extrapolate on this theme.
The Rebbe encouraged that children should learn these subjects as well (in a manner that is appropriate for their age).
The Three Weeks are an opportune time to do Teshuvah. These 21 days^[47]correspond to gematriyah (numerical value) of the Divine name of Ekyeh (אה־יה). One who does Teshuvah in these days can merit to a blessing in his sustenance. This is based on the Zohar that says that these 22 days (See note 95) correspond to the 22 years that Yosef was separated from Yaakov. Seven of these years were years of plenty. (While two of them were years of famine. These correspond to the 8^th and 9^th of Av.)^[48]
The three parshiyot (Torah portions) that are always read publicly in these weeks are Matot, Masei and Devarim (Pinchas is usually read during the Three Weeks. But when Matot and Masei are read as separate portions, Pinchas is read before the Three Weeks.) These correspond to different kinds of contemplation that should lead one to Teshuvah that are listed in the beginning of Pirkei Avot Chapter 3.
(Roshei Ha)Matot – Tribal leaders, corresponds to the concept of Da MeAyin Bata – Know from where you come.
Masei – Travels, corresponds to the concept of Le’An Attah Holech – Know to where you are going.
Devarim – Words, corresponds to the concept of Lifnei Mi Attah Atid Litein Din VeCheshbon – the reckoning we will have to give to G-d after 120 years.^[49]

The Nine Days

Friday, Rosh Chodesh Menachem Av/July 29 to Sunday evening, 10 Menachem Av /August 7

From Rosh Chodesh Av until after Tisha Be’av, it is appropriate to minimize in joy in the manner explained below.^[50] Despite this, one should maintain and even increase in permissible joy such as Torah study.

During these Nine Days the following rules apply:

Court Cases. If one has a court case with a non-Jew, one should try to postpone it until after the Nine Days.^[51] If possible, one should reschedule it for after 15 Av^[52] or, better yet, for the month of Elul.^[53]

Renovations – New Homes

One should not build or renovate one’s home.^[54]
One who is in middle of renovating his home and is paying non-Jewish workers by the job need not stop the workers from their job if this will cause him a significant financial loss.^[55] If one can pay them a small amount for them to delay their work, it is better to do so.
One who is renovating because his living quarters are too cramped may do the work in the Nine Days, up until the seventh of Av.^[56]
Building for the sake of a mitzvah (e.g., a shul) is permissible as is building to prevent a financial loss (e.g., if a wall needs strengthening to prevent it from breaking).^[57]
One may sign a contract to buy a new home if by not doing so he may lose that opportunity.^[58]
It is best not to move into a new home or apartment during this time. One should postpone this until after the 15^th of Av,^[59] or, better yet, until the month of Elul.^[60]
One should not plant a garden for pleasure. But one may plant for the purpose of eating fruits or vegetables. One may maintain their garden even if it does not produce food.^[61]
One may build a shul, yeshivah, or other communal building at this time.

Buying New Items

One should refrain from buying furniture or other expensive household items in the Nine Days even if one does not recite Shehechiyanu on these items. The same applies to a new car. One may, however, purchase such items for business use.^[62] One who needs items for their homes urgently (e.g., if they need a new air conditioning unit or washing machine) may purchase them.
One should also not buy simple clothing such as underwear.
One may not buy articles of clothing even if they don’t plan to wear them util after Tisha Be’Av.
If necessary, one may purchase non-leather shoes to wear on Tisha Be’Av. In this case, one should wear them for the first time before Tisha Be’Av.
One may purchase a sefer (holy book) from which to study Torah.
One may purchase simple items for home use such as plates and cups.

Washing Clothes

One may not wash or iron clothes during the Nine Days even if one does not plan to wear them until after Tisha Be-Av. Neither may one have a non-Jew wash or iron his clothes for him.^[63] It is even forbidden to wash with water alone without any detergent.
The Sefardic custom is to allow washing of clothes up until the week of TishaBe’Av. This year, since the fast of Tisha Be’Av is on Sunday, this Halacha is not relevant for Sefardim. Some are strict and consider the entire week that begins on July 31 as the week of Tisha Be’Av since the 9^th of Av falls out on Shabbat.^[64]
The clothes of very young children that are constantly getting dirty may be washed.^[65] It is customary to be lenient with the clothes of children under six years of age.^[66] If one can have a non-Jew wash these clothes, that is preferred.^[67]
It is not necessary to purchase new clothing for one’s young children in order to avoid washing.^[68]
If all of one’s clothes are soiled to the extent that they cannot be worn, one may wash the minimum that one needs to wear.^[69]
In the case where one is permitted to wash certain clothes (as explained above), one may not add other clothes to the washing machine.
When starting a wash load on Erev Rosh Chodesh (Thursday, July 28), one should take care to start it at such a time that the washing cycle will be complete before sundown. If necessary, one may begin the load if it will finish before nightfall.^[71] Some permit even starting the wash load right before sunset.
One should not bring his clothes to the dry cleaners^[72] even if he tells them not to clean the clothes until after Tisha Be’Av. Some are lenient in this matter.^[73]
Some say that a woman may not wash her wig (sheitel) during the Nine Days.^[74] Others disagree.^[75]
One who is traveling should take as many clothes as he will need for the trip rather than wash them during the trip.^[76] Others say that if it would be a great bother to take this amount of clothes, one may take less clothes and wash them when he has used them up.^[77]
Some say that one should not polish his shoes in these days. One may do so in honor of Shabbat.
One may spot-wash a stain as this small act does not distract one from mourning.

Wearing Freshly Laundered Clothing

One may not wear freshly laundered clothes during this time. Sefardim only need to observe this law during the week of Tisha Be’Av.^[78]
Similarly, one should not use fresh sheets, tablecloths, towels or hand towels.^[79]
If one needs to change one’s underwear due to discomfort, it is permissible.^[80]
A woman may wash and wear the white garments she needs in order to count the seven clean days.
It is customary to “pre-wear” other articles of clothing to be able to wear them during the Nine Days. The changes of clothing should be worn for enough time for them to be considered “worn” (a half hour is recommended^[81]) and not merely put on and taken off.^[82]
One may not “pre-wear” one’s clothes on the Shabbat during the Nine Days as this is considered a preparation for the weekdays. But one may put on a different shirt when they wake up in the morning and again after their afternoon nap as it is not obvious why one is doing so.^[83]
One who did not prepare clothes in this manner and needs to change his clothes should put the fresh clothes on the ground in such way that it gets (a bit) dirty (or, at least, wrinkled). He may then wear them.^[84] This applies to underwear and socks as well.
One may provide a (new) guest with fresh sheets and towels.^[85]
One may wash towels that are needed for public use such as a mikvah.
One should educate older children to observe these laws as well.
One may wear fresh clothes on Shabbos. The same applies to towels and tablecloths.
One who is going on a date (for shidduch purposes) may wear fresh clothes (and, if necessary, even new clothes) in order to look presentable.^[86]
One should also not wear new clothes even if they were purchased before the Three Weeks began.

Wearing Shabbat Clothes

One may not wear Shabbat clothes during the weekdays of the Nine Days.^[87] (In general, one should not wear one’s Shabbat clothing during the week unless it is a special occasion.^[88]) While in some (non-Chassidic) communities, the custom is to not to wear Shabbat clothes on Shabbat of the Nine Days except for the Shabbat shirt, the Chassidic custom is to wear Shabbat clothing.^[89] This is also the custom of the Vilna Gaon as well as the Sefardic custom.^[90] The reason for this custom is that it is forbidden to show public signs of mourning on Shabbat, and wearing weekday clothes on Shabbat is a public sign of mourning.^[91]

One may don Shabbat clothes (as per the customs mentioned above) on Friday afternoon at the same time one normally does on other Fridays.^[92] After Shabbat, some say that one should remove these clothes immediately.^[93] Other disagree.

· By the letter of the law, one may continue to wear their Shabbat clothes on the Motzei Shabbat of Tisha Be’Av as well.[94]

According to most opinions, one may not wear new clothes on the Shabatot of the Nine Day.^[95]If there is a brit or a pidyon haben, the parents, mohel, sandak or Kohen may wear (freshly laundered) Shabbat clothes. The woman who brings in the baby (kvater) may do so as well.^[96]

A bar mitzvah boy as well as his parents and grandparents may wear Shabbat clothes at his bar mitzvah celebration.

Sewing

One may not crochet, do needlework, knit, sew or do alterations on clothing at this time, nor may one ask (or pay) a non-Jew to do it.^[97] The reason for this is that the word for spinning (shetiyah) is similar to the even hashetiyah (the stone in the Holy of Holies upon which the Aron Kodesh was placed). By refraining from spinning thread, weaving, and sewing clothes, we remember that the building that stood over the even hashetiyah was destroyed.^[98]
In addition, this activity distracts one from the focus on mourning.^[99]
Both Sefardim and Ashkenazim should refrain from this for all of the Nine Days.^[100]
One may sew a button or a patch on a torn garment as the above rule does not apply to minor repairs.^[101]
By the letter of the law, one may hire a non-Jew to sew a new garment if it will not be ready until after Tisha Be’Av. It is, however, better to refrain from this as well.^[102]

Eating Meat and Drinking Wine

It is customary not to eat meat or chicken or to drink wine or grape juice during the Nine Days.^[103] The reason for this is to commemorate the loss of the wine libations and animal (meat) sacrifices.^[104]
In some Sefardic communities it is customary to permit eating meat and drinking wine on Rosh Chodesh and only to forbid it after this.^[105]
One may eat meat and/or drink wine if it is a seudat mitzvah (mitzvah feast). This includes: a Brit Milah, Pidyon Haben or a Siyum of a masechta which was completed on one’s regular learning schedule.^[106]
This only includes one who would normally attend this simcha if it had happened during the rest of the year.^[107]
It is customary not to eat food cooked with meat or chicken. If the food was not cooked with actual meat but was merely cooked in a fleishig (meaty) pot, it may be eaten.^[108]
One may cook with wine if the taste of the wine will not be noticed in the dish.^[109] If one made a bracha on a piece of meat and then realized it is in the middle of the Nine Days, he should taste a small amount so that his bracha not be in vain.^[110]
One may give meat to young children if they need it for their health.
If a young child needs to eat meat or chicken for health reasons, one may feed it to him.^[111]
One who is ill, may eat meat in order to gain strength.^[112]
On Shabbat one may eat meat and drink wine.^[113]
One who accepts Shabbat early may drink the Kiddush wine and eat meat at the Shabbat meal even before the sun set.
On the first Shabbat of the Nine days (2^nd of Av/July 30^th), one may continue to eat meat and drink at the third meal even after dark.
Regarding Havdalah see below.
It is customary not to drink grape juice, but it is permissible to drink other alcoholic beverages.^[114]

Bathing

It is customary not to bathe during the Nine Days.^[115]
The Sefardic custom is to refrain from bathing only during the week of TishaBe’Av.^[116] (See above as to how this week is defined, this year.)
If, as a result of heat and perspiration, one feels uncomfortable, one may shower or bathe, but only as necessary to relieve one’s discomfort.^[117]
One may wash parts of one’s body with soap and cold water.^[118]
Children who are constantly getting dirty may be bathed.^[119]
A man who goes to the mikvah on a daily or weekly basis may continue to do so during the Nine Days (but not on Tisha Be’Av).^[120]
A sofer who usually immerses in the mikvah before writing holy scrolls may do so during the Nine Days. Similarly, a sandak or a mohel may immerse in a mikvah before the brit.
On the first Friday of the Nine Days (Rosh Chodesh Tamuz/July 29) one may bathe as usual in honor of Shabbat.
By the letter of the law, Ashkenazim should not have a full shower on Erev Shabbat Chazon (August 5). Rather they should wash their hands, face and feet with hot water and soap and their hair without soap. Some are lenient in this regard.^[121]
A woman whose Mikvah night is during the Nine Days may prepare for the Mikvah with a hot bath and immerse in the Mikvah as usual.^[122]
A woman whose Mikvah night is the night after Tisha Be’Av should bathe and prepare herself on Erev Tisha Be’Av.^[123] Some say she should do the preparations after Tisha Be’Av.^[124]

Nail-cutting

There are differing opinions regarding cutting one’s nails during the week of Tisha be’Av (see above as to how the week of Tisha Be’Av is defined). In practice, Ashkenazim should be strict in this regard. During the rest of the Nine Days, it is permissible.^[125] Also, on Friday (even on the Friday before Tishab Be’Av), one may cut one’s nails in honor of Shabbat.

Engagements

It is permissible to get engaged during the Nine Days. One may have an engagement party without music or dancing. One may serve snacks but not a meal.^[126]

Trips

During the Nine Days, it is best not to go on a pleasure trip as this time is considered to have a bad mazal (fortune). One who needs to go on a trip should at least begin the preparations for the trip before the Nine Days.^[127]

Giving Gifts

Some say that one should refrain from giving during the Nine Days.^[128] Others disagree. (See below regarding Tish Be’Av.)^[129]

Kidush Levana

It is customary not to do Kiddush Levana until after Tisha Be’Av since until then people are in a state of sadness and mourning.^[130] The Vilna Gaon was of the opinion that one should do Kiddush Levana as soon as possible after the 3^rd day of the month and not wait until after Tisha Be’Av.^[131]
In a place that often has clouds, one may do Kiddush Levana before Tisha Be’Av in order to ensure that he not miss it completely.^[132]

Positive Things

It is a Chassidic custom to make or participate in Siyumim (celebration of completing a Torah Tractate) during the Nine Days. The Lubavitcher Rebbe explained^[133] that by increasing in Torah joy, we begin the transformation of these days to a time of joy and rejoicing. This transformation will be complete in the Messianic era as the verse says: “So said the L-rd of Hosts: ‘The Fast of the Fourth (the seventeenth of Tammuz which comes out in the fourth month from Nissan), the Fast of the Fifth (Tisha Be’Av), the Fast of the Seventh (TzomGedalya), and the Fast of the Tenth (Asara BeTevet) shall be for the house of Judah for joy and happiness and for happy holidays.”^[134]
If possible, the siyumim should take place on every day of the Nine Days including Tisha Be’Av. Since on Tisha Be’Av it is forbidden to study most parts of the Torah, the siyum should be made on Mo’ed Kattan whose last chapter may be studied on Tisha Be’Av.
One should endeavor to include as many people as possible in these siyumim in a manner of Berov Am Hadrat Melech (A large crowd is an honor to the king).^[135]
One who cannot make it to the siyum can participate in the simcha of the siyum by hearing it on the radio or the phone.^[136] If that is how he participates, it is forbidden for him to eat meat or drink wine.
The Chabad custom is not to eat meat or drink wine at these siyumim unless the person finished the tractate in the course of their regular learning. Even in this case, only people who would otherwise be invited to the siyum may eat meat as explained above.
The Rebbe suggested that this custom of having siyumim be extended to the 15^thAv.^[137]
One should add in giving tzedakah and studying Torah during this time.
It is especially appropriate to add to the study about the Bait HaMikdash at this time (see above).^[138]

Friday, Rosh Chodesh Menachem Av/July 29

This day is the Yohrteit of Ahron HaKohen.

Shabbat, 2 Menachem Av/July 29 and 30

· If one needs to taste the meat or chicken dishes that one is cooking on Friday, one may do so.^[139]

· As mentioned above, most communities have the custom to wear Shabbat clothes on Shabbat.

· One may wash clothes on Friday if one needs them for Shabbat.^[140]

· One may eat meat and drink wine as usual on this Shabbat as mentioned above even if one accepted Shabbat early. Regarding Havdalah, some say that it is best to have a child drink the wine or grape juice.^[141] Others say that one may drink it himself.^[142] If there is no child available, one may drink the wine himself.^[143]According to the Alter Rebbe, one may only give the wine to a child who is fulfilling the mitzvah of Havdalah with his blessing.^[144] Some have the custom to make Havdalah on grape juice or on other important beverages such as beer.

One should not eat meat at the Melava Malka.^[145]

Tuesday, 5 Menachem Av/ August 2

This day is the yahrtzeit of the Arizal.

Shabbat Chazon

9^th of Menachem Av/ August 5 and 6

The Shabbat before Tisha Be’av is referred to as Shabbat Chazon, reflecting the first word of the haftorah reading. Because the word Chazon means vision, the great Chassidic master, Rav Levi Yitzchak of Berditchev, taught that every year, on this Shabbat, G‑d shows us a vision of the Future Bait HaMikdash. Even if we are not aware of this vision, our neshamot (souls) are aware of it, and this causes us to yearn for the rebuilding of this temple.

This year the 9^th of Av falls out on Shabbat. Because it is forbidden fast or to (publicly) show signs of mourning on Shabbat, the fast day is pushed off until Saturday night and Sunday. On Shabbat the laws of mourning do not apply which means one may eat meat, drink wine, and wear fresh (Shabbat) clothes etc.
In places where people customarily dance on Shabbat, they may do so on this Shabbat as well.^[146]
Ashkenazim should refrain from having marital relations on this Shabbat as this is a private matter and refraining from it is not a public expression of mourning. Sefardim follow the opinion that marital relations are permissible. If it is the scheduled Mikvah night, Ashkenazim also follow the more lenient view and allow the woman to go to the Mikvah and the couple to have relations on this Shabbat.^[147]
A couple that is not in a Niddah state need not observe the harchakot (distancing laws) that apply when the woman is a Niddah.^[148]
One who accepts Shabbat early may eat meat and drink wine from that point and on.^[149]
One may also feed one’s young children the meat or chicken from the Shabbat food several hours before Shabbat.^[150]
One may wash clothes on Friday if one needs them for Shabbat as mentioned above.^[151]
One should have a joyful Shabbat meal as one would every week.
In some communities, the Haftorah is chanted to the tune of Eicha. This is not the Chabad custom.^[152]
Some have the custom to call up the Rav of the community for the maftir.^[153]
We recite the prayer of Av HaRachamim as usual on this Shabbat.
We do not recite Tzidkat’cha during Mincha of this Shabbat.^[154]
We do not study Pirkei Avot (Ethics of the Fathers) on this Shabbat afternoon since, according to many opinions (see below), one may not study Torah on this day.^[155]
One may eat meat and drink wine during the Third Meal.^[156]
Although the third meal is the final meal before the fast, we do not treat it as the Se’udah HaMafseket (in terms of eating eggs dipped in ashes and sitting on the floor). Rather one should eat whatever foods one wishes as one does on a regular Shabbat. Some say that one should not have this meal with a large group. One may certainly eat it with one’s family.^[157]
One should be careful to stop eating before sunset.^[158]
One should not remove one’s leather shoes or sit on a low stool until Shabbat ends.^[159]
No preparations should be made on Shabbat for Tisha Be’Av. This includes bringing kinot or non-leather shoes to shul.^[160]

Studying Torah on this Shabbat

Some say that one may not study Torah on this Shabbat as it is the 9^th of Av on which it is forbidden to study most Torah topics because Torah study gladdens the heart.^[161]
Others say that one may study Torah on this Shabbat.^[162]
Many authorities say that one may study Torah on this Shabbat up until midday (chatzot) on Shabbat afternoon when one should refrain from doing so.^[163]
Certainly, one may study parts of the Torah which are sad and/or relate to the destruction of the Bait HaMikdash. Several examples:^[164]
Megillat Eicha and the Midrash on Eicha
The sad parts of Yirmiyahu (Jeremiah) and Iyov (Job).
The last chapter of Tractate Mo’ed Kattan.
The story of the second destruction as recorded in Gittin 55b – 58a, or of the first destruction as recorded in Sanhedrin 96b and 97.
The Book of Josephus (Wars of the Jews).
The laws of mourning and of Tisha Be’Av may also be studied.
Some say that on this Shabbat one may study Chassidic books as long as one does not learn them in depth.^[165]
One may review the parsha and the Targum Onkelus (Shnayim Mikrah) on this Shabbat.^[166]

Motzei Shabbat

In practice, it is best to set the time for reciting the Maariv payer for some time after the end of Shabbat. This allows people to go home and change into their weekday clothes and remove their leather shoes before returning to Shul. One should say Baruch HaMavdil Bein Kodesh Lechol before doing so.^[167]

If one is davening in a shul that prays Ma’ariv immediately after Shabbat, he should remove his leather shoes after the recital of Barchu. (One should untie the laces beforehand and wash one’s hands after doing so.) In such a shul, the Chazzan should remove his shoes before Barchu so as not to interrupt in the middle of his prayers.^[168]

We do not make havdalah after Shabbat as the fast has already started at that time. Rather, Havdalah is recited after the fast, on Sunday night.^[169]
A person who is sick and will not be fasting should make Havdalah on this night.^[170] Some say that he or she should use beer or another important beverage rather than wine or grape juice.^[171] (One who is fasting may fulfill the mitzvah of Havdalah by listening to this Havdalah.) No blessing on fragrant spices should be recited, nor should the verses of Hinei Keil Yeshu’ati etc be said. (which are recited as an introduction to havdalah) be said.
Some say that a child who will not be fasting should make havdalah before eating. He or she should use grape juice or another important beverage. One child may recite Havdalah for many children.^[172] Others say that they may eat without hearing Havdalah and that they should simply hear havdalah on Sunday night with everybody else.^[173]
One should make the bracha of Borei Me’orei Ha’Esh on a (multi-wicked) candle before the reading of Eicha. If one did not do so, one may say this blessing later on that night .^[174]
One should make sure to say Ata Chonantanu (the Havdalah in the Maariv Amidah) or Baruch HaMavdil Bein Kodesh LeChol before doing any labor that is forbidden on Shabbat after Shabbat ends.

See below for more on the Maariv prayer

The Fast of Tisha Be’Av

Motzei Shabbat and Sunday, August 6 and 7

Tisha Be’av is a day of fasting and mourning for five tragedies:

1) In the year 1312 BCE, the spies returned from Israel with a bad report. The Jews believed them, as a result of which it was decreed that the entire generation perish in the desert.

2) The first Bait Hamikdash (Holy Temple) was destroyed by the Babylonians in the year 423 BCE.

3) The second Bait HaMikdash was destroyed by the Romans in the year 69. 4) Turnus Rufus, the governor of the Judean province in the first half of the second century, had the Temple Mount plowed under on that day.

5) In the year 133 the rebellion of Beitar was suppressed, resulting in the death of millions of Jews.

More recently:

a) The Jews were expelled from Spain in 1492.

b) Germany declared war on Russia in the start of World War I in 1914.

The following is a brief digest of the laws pertaining to this day: (For more information please see the Code of Jewish Law [O.C. 554 – 558].)

Forbidden Activities

The following activities are forbidden on Tisha Be’av:

Torah Study

As mentioned above, one may not study Torah on Tisha Be’Av .

See above as to what topics may be studied.

Even when studying the topics mentioned above, one may not delve deeply into them and develop new insights.

In addition;

One who will read from the Torah may review the Torah portion before the reading.
One should not think Torah thoughts.
One may only render a Halachic ruling if it is necessary for that time.^[175]
One should also not read secular articles or the news or do anything which will distract him from the mourning of the day.^[176]
Some permit one to learn from works that inspire a person to Teshuvah (e.g., Mussar and Chassidut).^[177]
One who normally recites Mishnayot after the prayers and then says a KadishDerabanan should say the Mishnayot of Ta’anit or Mo’ed Kattan that one may study on Tisha Be’Av. At Mincha on Sunday afternoon, one may say the regular Mishnayot.^[178]
Some say that one may do regular Torah study that is done by a community on a daily basis such as Chok LeYisrael or chitat (Chumash, Tehillim and Tanya) after Mincha.^[179]

Sitting^[180]

From nightfall on Motzei Shabbat until midday on Sunday, one may not sit on a regular chair. One may sit on the floor, a pillow, or a low stool.^[181]
One may stand if he wishes. Only if one wishes to sit, should he sit in the prescribed manner.
A pregnant woman or elderly person, for whom it is difficult to sit on a low stool, may sit on a regular chair.
One may sit as usual while traveling by car. When traveling by bus, one should stand, if possible.
One may not sit on a bed.
One who does hagbah (lifting the Sefer Torah) may sit while holding the Torah afterwards. Similarly, a sandek (one who holds the baby during a brit) may sit during the brit.
A nursing mother may sit as usual while nursing.

Sleeping in the Normal Fashion

When going to sleep at night, one should be somewhat uncomfortable. For example, if one usually sleeps with two pillows, he should use one instead. If he usually uses one, he should use none.^[182]
Some have a custom to sleep on the floor with a stone as a pillow.
I heard that the Lubavitcher Rebbe would sleep with his mattress on the floor on Tisha Be’Av.

Eating and Drinking

From sunset on Motzei Shabbat until nightfall on Sunday, it is forbidden to eat or drink.
One who is sick and confined to bed need not fast.^[183] Some say that even a sick person should fast unless he is in great pain.^[184] In case of doubt, one should discuss it with one’s doctor and rabbi.
A woman who has given birth within the last thirty days is not required to fast. Some say that a woman who gave birth more than seven days before Tisha Be’Avshould fast providing she feels well enough to do so.^[185]
Generally, a nursing mother or pregnant woman should fast. One who feels that she is unable to fast should consult her doctor and a rabbi.
It is advisable to drink a lot of water in the days leading up to the fast. If one has a special condition, a Rabbi should be consulted.
One who needs to swallow medication may do so.
One who needs liquid with which to swallow a pill should use a bitter liquid (such as vinegar mixed with water), if possible.^[186]
As mentioned above, it is best not to rinse one’s mouth on public fast days. One who is uncomfortable may use mouthwash but should be careful not to swallow any of it.
Children before Bar or Bat Mitzvah need not fast. Some say that children nearing the age of Bar or Bat Mitzvah should be trained to fast for several hours.^[187]

Wearing Leather Shoes^[188]

One may not wear leather shoes.

One should not wear shoes that have leather uppers or leather soles. In other words, there should be no leather anywhere in the shoes.
Leather belts and other leather garments are allowed.
Shoes made of non-leather (canvas etc.) are allowed.
Children should likewise refrain from wearing leather shoes.

Washing^[189]

One may not wash any parts of the body.
An area which becomes dirty may be washed.
One should wash Negel Vasser (the morning hand wash) until the knuckles.
Children (or others who are exempt from fasting) who are washing for bread may wash as usual. The same applies to Mayim Acharonim.
The same applies to Kohanim who are washing to say the blessing of the Kohanim (in the Sefardic tradition of doing a daily Priestly blessing) as well as to the Leviyim who are washing the hands of the Kohanim.
After washing in the morning, one may dry one’s hands and use his somewhat moist fingers to wipe his eyes.
If one’s eyes are encrusted, he may wash them as necessary.
One who uses the bathroom should wash his fingers until the knuckles.^[190]One who normally washes six times alternately after using the bathroom may do so on Tisha Be’Av as well but should only wash until the knuckles.^[191]
One who touched a part of his body that is normally covered may wash that hand up to the knuckles.^[192] One should refrain from touching these areas in order to minimize washing on Tisha Be’Av.^[193]
One should wash his hands up until his knuckles before praying.^[194]
A kallah, within 30 days after her wedding, may wash her face.^[195]
A woman may wash herself as necessary in order to do a hefsek tahara.^[196]
One who is preparing food (for children or for after the fast) may wash that food even though their fingers will get washed as well.^[197]
In addition, one may wash their hands to clean them before preparing food as needed.^[198]

Marital Relations

One may not have marital relations.
On the night of Tisha Be’Av (Motzei Shabbat) a couple should observe the laws relating to a time of Niddah (harchakot).^[199]
A woman whose mikvah night is on Motzei Shabbat should postpone the Mikvahuntil Sunday night. She should prepare for mikvah on Erev Shabbat in the afternoon. And then do another brief preparation before immersing after TishaBe’Av. Some say she should prepare after the Fast of Tisha Be’Av is over.^[200]One whose Mikvah night is the night after Tisha Be’Av (Sunday night) should do her preparations after nightfall.

Creams and Oils

One may not use any cream, oil, or lotion on one’s skin.
A Kallah may use creams on her face for thirty days after her wedding.
One may use deodorant as necessary.^[201]

Jewelry

It is customary for women not to wear jewelry on Tisha Be’Av with the exception of jewelry that one wears all of the time.^[202]

Smelling Spices

It is best not to smell fragrant spices on Tisha Be’Av.^[203] (For this reason we do not make a blessing on spices after Shabbat.)

Greetings

One may not greet others on Tisha Be’Av (e.g., by saying “hello” or “good morning”).
For this reason, we do not wish each other Gut Voch or Shavuah Tov (a good week) on this Motzei Shabbat.^[204]
If one is greeted by someone else, one should respond softly and inform that person (if appropriate) that on Tisha Be’Av greeting is forbidden.^[205]
It is permissible to nod one’s head in greeting.^[206]
One should not inquire as to how someone else is doing as a matter of course. If they are sick however, one may ask how they are doing.^[207]
One who needs to take leave of a friend on Tisha Be’Av should say “May we meet at the rebuilding of the Bait HaMikdash.”^[208]
One should not give gifts on Tisha Be’Av unless the recipient is poor and in need of the item.^[209]
One may give money or food to the poor on Tisha Be’Av.^[210]

Work^[211]

One should not do work on Tisha Be’Av before midday. This is referring to any work that takes time and would distract one from mourning.
It is best not to work even after midday as the Talmud says^[212] that “Whoever works on Tisha Be’Av will not see a blessing from that work.”
Simple work (e.g., turning the light on) may be done even in the morning.
If not working will cause one to have a great financial loss, one may work even in the morning.
It is customary not to begin preparing the meal with which to break the fast until after midday. If it will be a seudat mitzvah (a mitzvah meal e.g. the feast after a brit milah) and there will not enough time to prepare it, one may begin before midday.^[213]

Prayers on Tisha Be’Av

The Night of the Fast of Tisha Be’Av, Motzei Shabbat, August 6

It is customary to remove the parochet (curtain) from the aron kodesh (holy ark) or at least to leave it drawn to the side.
Some have the custom of also removing the cloth that covers the Bimah (table used for the Torah reading) and the chazzan’s shtender (lectern).
The lights should be dimmed for Maariv and the reading of Eicha.
One should sit on the floor (or a low bench) for the Maariv prayer and the reading of Eicha.
As mentioned above, the congregation should make the bracha of Borei Me’orei Ha’Esh on a (multi-wicked) candle before the reading of Eicha.
The reader should pause slightly between each verse and slightly longer between each chapter. He should read the final verse in every chapter in a louder voice than the rest of the chapter. The last verse should be said aloud by the congregation and then repeated by the reader.^[214]
After the reading of Eicha, several kinot (lamentations) are recited.
We do not recite Viyhi No’am on the Motzei Shabbat as this prayer commemorates the dedication of the Sanctuary. This is not appropriate on the day of its destruction.^[215]
We also do not recite the verses of Vayiten Lecha that are usually recited on Motzei Shabbat.^[216]
As mentioned above, one should not wish another person a Gut Voch or Shavuah Tov on this night.
It is customary in many communities to learn the story of the destruction after the nighttime prayers.^[217]

Morning Prayers

In the morning, we do not say the blessing of She’asah li Kol Tzarki since this blessing is to thank G-d for shoes and we may not wear (regular) shoes on TishaBe’Av. The bracha is also not recited at night at the end of Tisha Be’Avaccording to the Chabad custom.^[218]
Others say that this bracha should be recited on Tisha Be’Av.^[219]
We do not wear a Talit Gadol or Teffilin for Shacharit, only for Mincha.
One should not say a blessing on their Talit Katan in the morning.
One should not hold the tzitzit of his tallit katan for Baruch She’amar or for the reading of the Shema.^[220]
It is customary not to recite the Song of the Day or Ein K’elokainu until the afternoon.
We do not recite Tachanun (confessionary prayers). After the amidah, the Chazzan recites Half Kaddish.
Only those fasting may receive an aliyah.
After Shachrit it is customary to read kinot until Chatzot (midday). The final chapter ‘Eili Tzion’ should be recited verse by verse responsively.
One may not walk outside or converse during the recital of the kinot so as not to remove one’s mind from mourning.^[221]
It is proper for each individual to recite Eicha privately after completing kinot.^[222]
After Kinot we recite Ashrei, Uva L’tzion (omitting the verse V’ani Zos Briti), Kaddish (without the verse of Titkabel), Aleinu, Mourner’s Kaddish.
A mourner, during the shiva, may come to shul during the morning of Tisha Be’Av.
If there is a brit on Tisha Be’Av, it should take place after the completion of Kinot. The parents, Mohel and Sandak may wear Shabbat clothes during the Brit. They may not, however, wear leather shoes. The father of the baby, the mohel and the sandak may break their fast after Mincha Gedolah (a half hour after midday).^[223]
It is mentioned in the Shulchan Aruch that it is customary to visit the cemetery after morning prayers of Tisha Be’Av. The Chabad Rebbes didn’t follow this custom. The reason for this may be that on Tisha Be’Av one may not go to the Mikvah, and it is customary in Chabad for men to immerse themselves in the Mikvah before going to the cemetery. ^[224]

Afternoon Prayers

At Mincha time, one may say the Tehillim of the day as well as the Chumash and Tanya.^[225]
It is important to give additional Tzedakah on thisday .
The order of Mincha is:
1. The Parochet (curtain) should be replaced on the Aron Kodesh (holy ark).
2. One should don Tallit and Tefillin with a Bracha.
3. Chabad custom is to begin by reciting the three chapters of Shema,^[226] Shir Shel Yom (Song of the Day), Mourner’s Kaddish, Ein K’elokainu, Kaddish D’rabanan, Tehillim, followed by Korbanot, Ashrei and Half-Kaddish.

4. The Torah is brought out and three Aliyot are read. The third Aliyah is also Maftir. All the three men called up to the Torah should be fasting.

5. The prayers of Nachaim and Aneinu are inserted in the silent Amidah, in the blessings of Boneh Yerushalayim and Shome’ah Tefilah respectively.

If one forgot to say Nacheim, some say it should be inserted in Shome’ah Tefilah, before “ki atah.”^[227] Others say it should be inserted in Retzeh, before V’techezenah.^[228] In any case, one should finish those berachot as usual. One who did not remember to say it during those blessings can add it to Elokai Netzor.^[229]
If one did not recite Nacheim at all, he need not repeat the Amidah.

6. The Chazzan should recite Aneinu, Nachaim, and Birkat Kohanim in the repetition of the Amidah. In Sefardic communities (and in Israel) the Kohanim recite the Priestly blessing.

7. Minchah is concluded with Aleinu and Mourner’s Kaddish.

8. Those who put on “Rabeinu Tam’s Tefillin” should do so after Mincha.

9. One should not study the Rambam of the day, the Daf yomi or any other daily shiuruntil nightfall.

Motzoei Tisha Be’Av

Sunday night, August 7

Ma’ariv and Break-fast

At nightfall, one should pray Maariv as usual.
One should wash Negel Vasser properly (six times alternately) after Maariv.
One should make havdalah before eating. This Havdalah does not include the blessings on fire or spices. Some also skip the verses of Hinei Keil Yeshu’ati(this is not the Chabad custom). The Mishna Berurah rules that one may drink the wine or grape juice from this havdalah themselves.^[230] Others say that it is best to have a child drink the wine or grape juice.^[231] Certainly, if there is no child available, one may drink the wine oneself.^[232] As explained above, according to the Alter Rebbe, one may only give the wine to a child who is fulfilling the mitzvah of Havdalah at that time.^[233]
One should not recite the blessings of smelling spices or the candle (even if one forgot to say the blessing on the candle on Motzai Shabbat) as these are only recited on Motzei Shabbat.
It is proper to do Kiddush Levana on the night after Tisha Be’av. The Arizal say that this alludes to the birth of Moshiach ben David.
It is best to also put on leather shoes, recite havdalah and eat before Kiddush Levana in order to recite it with full simcha (joy). If by doing so, one will miss saying this prayer with a minyan, one may say it while still fasting.
One may not eat meat or drink wine on Sunday evening. However, the other restrictions of the Nine Days and Three Weeks are now permitted.^[234]

Our sages teach that whoever mourns for Yerushalayim will merit to see it rebuilt.^[235] May we merit it speedily in our days!

Tisha Be’Av Times (taken from Chabad.org)

[1] Eicha 1:3

[2] Avodat Yisrael of the Kozhnitzer Maggid, Parshat Masei

[3] See No’am Elimelech, Parshat Vayeshev, D.H. Oh Yomar Vayeshev

[4] See Chidushei Agaddot Maharsha, Bechorot 8a (pg. 156 bottom of left column)

[5] O.C. 551:17

[6] Mishnah Berurah 98. This is based on the fact that the Vilna Gaon holds that one may make she’hechiyanu throughout the Three Weeks, coupled with the fact that some are lenient on Shabbat. Similarly, some are lenient on Rosh Chodesh (Sha’ar HaTziyun, 99).

[7] HaYom Yom, Tammuz 21

[8] Rama O.C. ibid

[9] Yechave Da’at 1:37

[10] Yalkut Yosef, Yemei Bein HaMeitzarim, 9

[11] O.C. ibid

[12] Sha’arei Halacha Uminhag 2, siman 225

[13] Nitei Gavriel 17:2 quoting Responsa Machazeh Avraham (by Rabbi Avraham Menachem, Steinberg of Brody), vol. 3, Siman 13. That response is regarding Sefirat Ha’Omer but the same would apply to the Three Weeks.

[14] See Nitei Gavriel 17 and sources quoted there that there are two reasons for not buying or moving into a new house. One is so that it is forbidden to say the Shehechiyanu blessing. And the second is that it is not an auspicious time. If, however, one is buying the property as an investment, neither of these reasons apply.

[15] Elya Rabba 551:4

[16] See Nitei Gavriel 17:13

[17] Ibid 9

[18] Ibid 15:1 quoting the Shevet HaLevi, 6, 69. See also vol. 2, 57

See here.

[19] Shevet HaLevi 8:127 citing this as the common custom (with which he disagrees) but says that one can explain their custom).

[20] Ibid, quoting the Igrot Moshe O.C. 4:21:4

[21] Ibid 10 – 12

[22] Tzitz Eliezer 16:19

[23] BeTzel Hachochma 6:61

[24] She’arim HaMetzuyanim Bahalacha on Kitzur Shulchan Aruch, 126, cited in Shevet HaLevi, 6:69.

[25] O.C. 551:2

[26] Yabi’ah Omer 6:43

[27] Mishna Berurah 551:16 and 19 and Sha’ar HaTziyon, 26

[28] Halichot Shlomo, Bein HaMeitzarim, Dvar Halacha, 6

[29] See O.C. ibid 18

[30] See Sha’arie Halacha Uminhag 2, pg. 172 re the Nine Days and Igrot Kodesh, 24, page 357

[31] Nitei Gavriel 23

[32] Rama, O.C. ibid, 3

[33] See Mechaber O.C. ibid

[34] Kitzur Shulchan Aruch 122:4 see O.C., ibid, 13

[35] See https://www.star-k.org/articles/kashrus-kurrents/563/electric-shavers/

[36] Igrot Moshe 4: 102. As to the week of Tisha Be’Av, see there O.C. vol. 5, Siman 24, ot 5, regarding one who will lose his job and will not have money to feed his family

[37] Mishnah Berurah 551:82. See there that some are lenient in this regard until the week of Tisha Be’Av.

[38] Sha’arei Halacha Uminhag 2, pg. 303

[39] Ibid, 79

[40] See Piskei Teshuvot 551:43

[41] Mishnah Berurah, 551:20

[42] Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach in Halichot Shlomo, Bein HaMeitzarim 14, Devar Halacha, 10

[43] Sha’arei Halacha Uminhag 2, pg. 229

[44] Tanchuma, Tzav, 14

[45] See Likutei Sichot, 18, sicha on Parshat Masei – Bein HaMeitzarim

[46] Hitva’aduyot 5750, vol. 4, page 55, note 18

[47] The three weeks are actually 22 days since they span three weeks and one day. Perhaps the number of 21 does not count the 17^th of Tammuz since the fast only starts in the morning. See above regarding the laws of mourning on the eve of the 17^th of Tammuz.

[48] Ohr LaShamayim by Rav Meir Rotenberg of Apt (1760 – 1827), Parshat Balak, paragraph beginning with Ve’inyan Yetziat Mitzrayim, citing Zohar Chadash, Parshat VaYeishev page 29, side 4

[49] Nitei Gavriel 24, note 12 in the name of Rav Yaakov Tanenbaum of Potnack

[50] Taanit 26b

[51] O.C. 551:1

[52] Hanhagot Chassam Sofer, quoted in Nitei Gavriel, 27, note 15

[53] Magen Avraham, quoted in Mishnah Berurah, on ibid, 2

[54] Mishnah Berurah, 551:12

[55] Ibid

[56] Nitei Gavriel, 28:8

[57] Mishnah Berurah, 551:13

[58] Ibid, 11

[59] Igrot Kodesh, 9, page 228

[60] Ibid, 19, page 390

[61] O.C. 551:2, Kara Alai Mo’ed, 3, note 3

[62] Igrot Moshe, O.C. vol. 3, 80, Rav Vozner in Kovet MiBait Levi, vol. 13, page 24

[63] Rama, O.C. 551:3

[64] Mechaber, ibid and 4 and Yalkut Yosef, Dinei Yemei Tisha Be’Av, 14

[65] See O.C. 551:14

[66] Nitei Gavriel, 36:3

[67] Ibid

[68] Ibid, 7

[69] Ibid, 35:5

[70] Ibid, 14

[71] Ibid, 15

[72] Igrot Moshe O.C. 3:79

[73] See Mishnah Berurah, ibid, 34

[74] Rav Vozner, Kovet MiBait Levi, Bein HaMeitzarim, page 14

[75] Rav Sheinberg cited in Responsa Rivevot Efrayim, vol. 6, Siman 291, ot 3

[76] Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach cited in Nitei Gavriel, 35, note 46

[77] Rav Moshe Feinstein in Sefer HaZikaron Mevakshei Torah, Chol HaMoed, page 465b, regarding Chol HaMoed.

[78] O.C. ibid, 3

[79] Ibid

[80] Nitei Gavriel 34:5

[81] But see the opinion of Rav Gestetner, cited in Responsa Rivevot Efrayim, 3, Siman 340, that, for white clothes, even one minute is sufficient.

[82] Ibid, 3, Yalkut Yosef, ibid, 12

[83] See the Ben Ish Chai in response Rav Pa’alim, vol. 4, O.C. 29

[84] Ibid, 4

[85] Ibid, 21

[86] Shevet HaLevi, 9:131

[87] O.C. 551:1

[88] See O.C. 262

[89] See sources quoted in Nitei Gavriel, 45:1

[90] Kaf HaChaim, 551:13. In some places, Sefardim do not wear white on these Shabatot.

[91] Aruch HaShulchan, 55:11. See Responsa of Radvaz, vol. 2, Siman 693. In earlier generations the Shabbat clothes were not so different than the weekday clothes, so it was not a public sign of morning to wear the weekday clothes on Shabbat. See Rama O.C. ibid, Aruch HaShulchan O.C. ibid, 11

[92] Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach in Shalmei Moed, Chapter 90, note 51

[93] Shemirat Shabbat Kehilchatah, vol.2, note 152 in the name of the Chazon Ish

[94] Nitay Gavriel, 94:5,

[95] Igrot Moshe, O.C. vol. 3:80

[96] Mishnah Berurah, 551:3

[97] O.C. ibid, 7 See Mishnah Berurah 53

[98] Talmud Yerushalmi, Pesachim 4, 1

[99] Vilna Gaon, cited in Biur Halacha, 551, D.H Venahagu

[100]Mechaber ibid

[101] Nitei Gavriel 37, 2 in the name of the Chazon Ish

[102] Rama, O.C. ibid, 7

[103] O.C. ibid, 10

[104] Bait Yosef, 552, D.H. Katav HaKolBo See Bava Batra 60b

[105] See Moreh Ba’etzbah of the Chida, 8:233

[106] O.C. ibid

In the beginning of the Nine Days, all those invited may eat meat and drink wine. During the week of Tisha Be’Av, only the Balei Simcha, their immediate relatives and an additional ten people may do this (Rama, 551:10).

Some say that one may hasten their learning to finish earlier than they would otherwise, but that they should not delay their learning for this purpose (Kaf HaChaim, 551:161).

[107] Mishnah Berurah on ibid, 75

[108] Mishna Berurah ibid, 63

[109] See Piskei Teshuvot 551:39

[110] Nitei Gavriel 38:12

[111] Ibid, 1 see Mishna Berurah ibid, 70

See Kara Alai Moed by Rabbi Yosef Dov Septimus that some say one may feed meat to children younger than four years old. Some are lenient regarding chicken up to nine years old.

[112] Rama, 551:9

[113] O.C. 552:10

[114] Nitei Gavriel, 39:4 and 5

[115] O.C. ibid, 16

[116] Nitei Gavriel, 42:1

[117] Ibid, 4

[118] Mishnah Berurah, ibid, 94

[119] Nitei Gavriel, ibid, 6

[120] Ibid, 11

[121] See Shloshim Yom Lifnei HaChag, by Avraham Dickman, page 231 and She’arim HaMetzuyanim BaHalacha, 122:8

[122] Rama O.C. ibid

[123] Biur Halacha on ibid D.H. Im

[124] Shi’urei Shevet HaLevi, 199:4

[125] Shemirat Shabbat Kehilchata, vol. 2, chapter 42, note 190 in explanation of the Mishnah Berurah, 551:20. See also Taz, 551:13

[126] Mishna Berurah ibid, 16

[127] Nitei Gavriel 32:3

[128] Rav Chaim Kanievsky cited in Kara Alai Moed, Chapter 4, note 25

[129] Rav Vozner in Kovetz MeBait Levi, vol. 13, page 24

[130] Rama, O.C. 551:8

[131] Maseh Rav, ot 159

[132] See Aruch HaShulchan, 551:22

[133] Sichot Kodesh 5735, page 344, see Sha’arei Halacha Uminhag, vol. 2 pg. 180

[134] Zechariah, 8:19

[135] Sha’arei Halacha Uminhag, ibid

[136] Sefer HaSichot, 5740 vol. 3, pg. 672

[137] Sefer HaSichot 5751, vol. 2, page 733

[138] Sha’arei Halacha Uminhag, ibid, pg. 181

[139] Rav Vozner in Kovetz MiBait Levi, vol. 13, page 49

[140] Mishnah Berurah, ibid, 32

[141] See sources quoted in Nitay Gavriel, 96, note 3

[142] Mishnah Berurah, 556:3. The Lubavitcher Rebbe once indicated that the wine should be given to a child (Sichot Kodesh, 5738, vol. 3 pp. 496).

[143] Nitay Gavriel, ibid

[144] The Alter Rebbe writes in the laws of havdalah that one can give others to drink the havdalah wine instead of drinking it themselves. But only if those people are also fulfilling the mitzvah of Havadalah with him.

[145] Igrot Moshe, O.C. vol. 4:21, ot 4

[146] Nitay Gavriel, 93:7

[147] O.C. 554:19, Mishnah Berurah, 40

See Sha’ar HaTziyun 46 that some are also lenient if the husband came back from a trip on Friday.

[148] Nitay Gavriel, 93:6

[149] Shloshim Yom Lifnei HaChag, page 232, note 176, citing Rav Moshe Feinstein

[150] Elyah Rabbah, 551:24

[151] Mishnah Berurah, ibid, 32

[152] See Nitay Gavriel, 47:9

[153] Magen Avraham 282:12

[154] O.C. 559:1

[155] Rama, 553:2

[156] Mishnah Berurah, 551:56

[157] O.C. 552, 10 and Mishnah Berurah, 23

[158] Ibid, 24

[159] Nitay Gavriel, 94:1 and 2. See there that one who keeps the time of Rabbeinu Tam should remove his shoes after Barchu.

[160] Nitay Gavriel, 93:9

[161] Rama 553:2 and O.C. 554:1

See Mishnah Berurah, 553:8 that many acharonim permit learning on Erev Tisha Be’Av and that one should not protest if he sees someone following this view.

[162] Mishnah Berurah, 10 in the name of the Taz

[163] Chatam Sofer, O.C. 156 and other sources cited in Nitay Gavriel, 92 note 2

[164] Ibid

[165] Nitay Gavriel, 9: 7

[166] Magen Avraham, 554;7

[167] Nitay Gavriel, 94:5

[168] Ibid, 4

[169] O.C. 556

[170] Sha’arei Teshuvah, 556:1

[171] Nitay Gavriel, 95:8

[172] Responsa of Divrei Yatziv, 243

[173] Shmirat Shabbat Kehilchatah, vol. 2, chapter 62:45

[174] Mishnah Berurah, ibid, 1

[175] Mishnah Berurah, 554:5

[176] See Aruch HaShulchan Y.D. 384:9

[177] See sources quoted in Kara Alai Mo’ed, 8, note 4

[178] Sha’arei Halacha Uminhag, 2, pgs. 183 – 184

[179] See also Sefer HaSichot, 5751, vol. 2, page 691, end of note 87 that this leniency also applies to learning about the Bait HaMikdash. It would seem that this can only be said regarding one who learns this topic on every day of the Three Weeks or the like.

[180] See Nitei Gavriel chapter 68

[181] O.C. 559:3

[182] Ibid, 555:2

[183] Mechaber, 554, 6, see sources quoted in Nitai Gavriel, vol. 2:65, note 22

[184] Rama, 554, 6

[185] See sources quoted in Nitei Gavriel, vol. 2, 65:6

[186] Kaf HaChaim 554:34

[187] See sources quoted in Kara Alai Mo’ed, 9:1

[188] O.C. 554:16

[189] Ibid, 6 – 12

[190] If he did not touch a part of his body that is normally covered and he is not about to pray, there is a question if he may wash his hands. In this case, it is preferred to actually touch such an area in order to be able to wash one’s hands (Shulchan Aruch HaArav, 613:4).

[191] Minchat Yitzchak, 10:45

[192] See Mishnah Berurah, 613:6

[193] Nitei Gavriel 72:13

[194] Aruch Hashulchan 554:10

[195] Mishna Berurah, 554:29

[196] O.C. 551, Sha’ar HaTziyun, 35

[197] Magen Avraham, 554:11

[198] Aruch HaShulchan, ibid

[199] See Shulchan Aruch HaRav, 40, 8 and ibid, Y.D. 184, Kuntres Acharon 2

[200] See Rama, 551:16, Mishna Berurah, 554:18

[201] Nitei Gavriel 73:6

[202] Ibid, 8

[203] O.C. 556, Sha’ar HaTziyun, 1

[20/4] Maharil, cited in Nitay Gavriel, 95:18

[205] Mishnah Berurah, 554:42

[206] Ritva, Mo’ed Kattan, 27b D”H Tanu Rabanan

[207] Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach, Bein HaMeitzarim, 15, Orchot Halacha 30

[208] Ibid

[209] Mishnah Berurah, 554:41, Kaf HaChaim, 91

[210] Kaf HaChaim, 554:91

[211] O.C. 554:22 – 24 with Mishnah Berurah

[212] Ta’anit 30b

[213] See 559:10 and Mishnah Berurah, 40

[214] Ibid, 559:2

[215] Ibid and Mishnah Berurah 7

[216] Ibid 9

[217] Kaf HaChaim, 552, 6:

[218] See ibid, 554;78 that this is the opinion of the Arizal

[219] Mishnah Berurah 554:31

[220] Piskei Teshuvot 555:2

[221] Rama, 559:5

[222] Mishnah Berurah, 559:2

[223] O.C. 559:9

[224] Igrot Kodesh, 11:307

[225] Sha’arei Halacha Uminhag, 2, pg. 183

[226] See Kaf Hachaim, 555:7 but see Mishnah Berurah, 5

[227] Taz, 557:1

[228] Mishnah Berurah, 557:2

[229] Kaf HaChaim, 557:2

[230] Mishnah Berurah, 556:3

[231] See sources quoted in Nitay Gavriel, 96, note 3

[232] Nitay Gavriel, ibid

[233] The Alter Rebbe writes in the laws of havdalah that one can give others to drink the havdalah wine instead of drinking it themselves. But only if those people are also fulfilling the mitzvah of Havadalah with him.

[234] Mishnah Berurah, 558:4 and 5

[235] Ta’anit 30b

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